Beer

Keggle Beer Folly

The nectar of the gods or the hair of the dog, either way this sweet little beverage is oh so tasty … beer. I’m adding this page to the blog to ramble on about all that is tasty with beer. As many of you know, not only do I drink it and have the belly to prove it, but I also make it. Thanks to President Carter who legalized homebrewing up to 100 gallons per adult, per household. That’s what I’m talking about legislation for the people. This page will include antidotes about the brewing process, maybe a few beer reviews or anything intoxicating to talk about. I’ll let my mind ferment on this for a bit. First things first, to all the Miller Lite drinkers, check your can if you care about your calories, the said Lite beer boasts 97 calories, pretty sweet. Now, check out a pub draught can of Guinness, mmmm, it only has 100 calories. So if you’re drinking Miller Lite because of calories then stop and drink something bit more tasty.  Ok, now that I’ve got that off my chest, I actually have a beer folly story to share:

 

Currently in my brewery set up I’ve been using two turkey fryers, one for the brew kettle and the other for a hot liquor tank. For the none brewers a hot liquor tank is a fancy geeky word for hot water. In brewers terms water is used to clean and liquor is used to make beer. It could even come from the same spigot, but it’ll still retain the two different names. Silly, I know. The biggest problem with the turkey fryer is that it’s only a 7 gal. pot, and of course, just like everything in America, bigger is better. With a larger kettle I won’t have to worry as much about boil overs and the mess that then ensues. Well I was talking to a guy at work about this and his brothers friend is a beer truck driver. I asked him what the odds where that an empty keg would fall off the back of the truck. Now, I know, that this isn’t the best way to acquire a keg, I can find them online for about $150, but I figure since I don’t cheat on my taxes, this is one way … whatever I don’t need to justify my actions. One day, the said co-worker mentioned to me that it was in his car. I was stoked. It was about 1/2 full of stale old something Light and not Miller. When I got home I wanted to take the sanke valve out so I could drain the keg of the bad beer. I went inside, changed and grabbed a screwdriver and once again headed into the backyard. I know kegs have pressure which I wanted to first release, so I used the blunt end of the flathead screwdriver and pushed down on the silver ball in the middle of the keg. The whoshing sound of gas escaping was a wonderful sound, and there was a bit of beer foaming up through the top, but the amount of pressure it took to hold that ball down I figure it’d be best if I wedge the screwdriver in there so I could walk away. I proceeded to wedge it in and it was working, but what happened next was unexpected. A four foot Old Faithful style geyser of stale beer shot out of the top of the keg and showered me. Well that was funny, it was good that I was outside, now I’m just sticky and stale. Then I flipped the keg on it’s side, straddle this bad boy and wedge the flathead in and this time only the gas escaped and not beer. Sweet. I put the keg away and cleaned up, beer still inside, just no gas now. After work the next day, I came home, changed, grabbed some tools and went to the basement this time to pull the whole sanke assembly apart so I could empty the keg. Well I started and then figured I should double check to make sure that all the gas had escaped and lo and behold there was some pressure. So what did I do? but wedge the flathead again inside and guess what? Yup, sprayed myself again. Not as bad this time, but still a spraying. Once again I moved the operation outside and ended up successfully taking it apart, and dumped the old nasty beer, now it sits. I have some parts on order that should be arriving tomorrow so I can then put this keggle together. I am going to cut the top off, grind the top so I don’t cut myself, and then punch a hole in the side wall near the bottom and install a ball valve assembly this way I can boil the wort (sugars extracted from grain mixed with liqour, these are the fermentable sugars that make beer). Then I’ll be able to open the valve and drain the wort into a carboy to prep it for the fermentation stage. Once this conversion is complete, i’ll post some photos of the finished keggle (Keg+kettle=keggle).